NOTE! I wrote this article over a year ago…and it’s just as true today as it was back then. I hope it touches you like it touched me….. — Barbara
Why hello! Thanks so much for stopping by this particular article!
I’ll tell you now, you’re going to adore what is revealed…
…because it’s something you can take away yourself and share with those whom you love as well.
It all started at 8am this morning. You see, I’ve always been told by my mom that your life is blessed if you develop 2 or 3 really close soul-friends or fellow life-travelers during your lifetime….and I had the honor and privilege of meeting one of these super people today and hitting the local fleamarkets with our kids.
During our lives, we had found and lost contact with one another as our responsibilities would take us about the globe. But you know something? Even if we haven’t spoken for months, we can immediately resume our connection with each other as though it was only yesterday since we had last chatted.
20 years ago or so during my net.goddess days, I was moved to immortalize the following on the Usenet group soc.singles.
A FRIEND IS ALWAYS A PRICELESS GEM AND YOU’RE NEVER TOO OLD FOR MORE
by Emily Wilkens
It’s wonderful when friendships thrive over the years. It’s wonderful, too, when you make new friends and the good news is : You’re NEVER too old to do so.
I thought about this recently when I treated myself to a long long-distance phone call to a friend I’ve had since high school. Because we live in different cities, we don’t see each other that often but, thanks to the telephone, we talk. When we do, it’s as if we’d just seen each other yesterday. The years fall away and we’re girls again, perhaps even closer because of all the history we’ve shared over the years.
It’s not as easy to develop the easy and close rapport with new acquaintances, but it’s possible. I have two relatively new "girlfriends" I often see for lunch or a movie or call when I have good or bad news to share.
New or old, there’s nothing so comforting as a friend.
Friendships often flounder from lack of attention. You’re too busy so you forget to pick up the phone, write a letter or send a birthday card.
For shame. Friendship is important and keeping in touch forges links.
When life is going badly, we sometimes avoid seeing or calling friends because we’re depressed but that’s just when a friend in need is a friend indeed.
Whether you write or phone, you’ll feel better for sharing your problem with someone who cares about you and who would, if she could, make it better.
There’s no need to carry the full load by yourself. In time of need and trouble, it is very comforting to have friends you can turn to. People give of themselves when they’re needed – just as you would if someone reached out to you.
During life, friendships come and go. Some are lost for petty reasons – because we misinterpret intentions, because we hid hurt or anger instead of clearing up misunderstandings that grow into mountains.
Friends can speak candidly but not cruelly to each other. Tact helps friendships to flourish.
As for making new friends, it’s easier than you think. Be friendly, helpful, supportive. Appreciate what others do for you. Find things you can do for them, for when it comes right down to it, friends being there for each other is really what it’s all about.
Last month I finally got around to calling a friend of mine from college and high school whom I hadn’t seen for about 5 years.
She and I had gone our separate ways, she into graduate school and I into driving my managers crazy.
Well, when we went out to dinner, it was as though those 5 years’ of silence never had happened; we were able to establish our rapport again and discuss life, liberty and our respective SOs. In thinking about it, it brought to mind that while relationships are important, friends deserve the same kind of consideration too….because those are the relationships that almost always will last thru thick and thin. — Barbara Ling
Well! Today is approximately 20 years since I last wrote the above…and let me tell you, the truth that Emily Wilkens had penned back then is burnished into an unbelievable shine!
We had such a downright….FUN! outing. While our respective children were gamboling to the various stalls (yes! I found 6 more tank tops that have wolves on them!), we talked about how our kids would be today if we ourselves didn’t raise them. She brought up the following point:
"Y’know, Barbara, I knew you back when you were their age and how really pathetic a person you were back then – it’s amazing you’ve raised your kids to be so strong and self-confident! Heck, it’s amazing how you transformed yourself!"
Friends can talk candidly – how true that is!
But she’s totally right, of course. Back then, limp spagetti had more personality than did I…I’m tremendously proud of the character-building and life-learning my past decades have taught me. And when I look at my kids, I realize – I broke the cycle of passiveness when it comes to self-confidence…and have shown my children how to reject such behaviours and instead take ownership of all they want to achieve.
That’s gold. That made all the hell thru which I went….worth it in spades.
My friend and I took our kids out to lunch and we chatted about our families, revealed to our children funny tales from our high school years (the bus breaking down in the snowstorm while driving to Quebec for the Marching Band competition was one of the favorites) and then called it a day. Came back , realized it’s 100 degrees outside or so, and promised myself that really and truly, I’ll do my 2.4 mile circle walk….soon. But first I have to blog!
Which of course brings me back to the most important person in this post – YOU!
Do YOU have friendships you treasure…or do you take them for granted and think, oh heck, they’ll always be around, why bother to touch base? I know I do sometimes…and that’s something I’m proactively trying to fix.
Take some time NOW to drop your friends an email or call them up or simply touch base and tell them…
"Hey! I was thinking about you – thanks for always being there."
Such are the gifts that make your life’s experience precious beyond belief. You’ll deliver a smile to your friends and leave them with a song in their hearts. And that, of course, can only be described as a Very Good Thing indeed.
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