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RANT - What the eBay Affiliate Program is Missing Part 2 - Parallel Universe Shipping!

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TwitterBudgie Wants to Rescue!Two days ago, I wrote my first Rant about the eBay Affiliate Program - the fact that there’s no celebrity endorsements aside from Weird Al.  It’s time for Rant Number 2!

I’m utterly positive that you’ll join me in angsting over the way eBay items are delivered…is really a bummer more painful than reloading Twitter only to see that cute little hourglass never complete….or discovering your last coffeecup grew a crack larger than the Grand Canyon and chose to break just when you sat down with your boiling hot cup of coffee balanced on your lap!

Why is this, I hear you cry?  Because….

There’s NO PARALLEL UNIVERSE eBAY AFFILIATE PROGRAM MATERIALIZATION!!

Oh, be still my beating heart…I know, I know, this  frustrates me too!

After all, I revealed back in April Fools Day the secret Twitter Budgie Twitter Network, which describes how the Twitter Budgies get around all sorts of Twitter limitations by:

…How does the Twitter Budgie resolve the 140 character limitation?

Very easily. When the 140 character limitation is encountered, the Twitter Budgie rapidly prints out your huge message, tucks it into a FedEx mailer, jumps back into the Budgie Transporter Mobile, simultaneously clones itself to however many people are following you on Twitter, and then beak-delivers the message to that person. Once all the messages have been delivered, the alternative-universes Twitter Budgies merge back into the original Twitter Budgie and return home ….MORE…..

Thus, if that service is already in place, why on earth cannot eBay sellers use the same technology and zap their items to the buyers via the same fashion?

WELL?  Just think of how useful that would be! 

My Hero!Someone visits your blog and sees the goodies listed by the eBay affiliate program!  Golly, says the someone, I wanna give the blogger lots of commissions buy that! and Poof! they do…resulting in Poof #2, the item materializing on top of their keyboards via the TwitterBudgie.

Astounding, I know.  What do you think?  I’d love to read!

Enjoy,

Barbara

ps - speaking about parallel universes:

1 CENT CD: DJ Broken Window 'V.2 Parallel Universe' x


PAT METHENY PARALLEL UNIVERSE JAPAN LTD MINI-LP CD NEW


NEW Parallel Universe of Self …


NEW Parallel Universe …


Outcast PC CD alien parallel universe adventure game!

Popularity: 15% [?]

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  1. RANT - What the eBay Affiliate Program is Missing Part 1 - Celebrity Endorsements!
  2. Top 10 SEO, TwitterBudgie, fresh coffee, April Fools and more
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  5. Twelcome To My Twitter Page!

Barbara Ling

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3 Comments

  1. DianeNo Gravatar on 16.05.2008 at 05:00 (Reply)

    That is so cute! How did you find such a small envelope and a small eBay logo to tuck into it?


  2. BarbaraNo Gravatar on 16.05.2008 at 05:06 (Reply)

    Hi Diane!

    ‘Tis the miracle of Photoshop. :) I’ve been using Photoshop now since (gosh…hmmmm….) 1996? That TwitterBudgie DID perch on my finger, but everything else I owe to the wonders of creativity.

    Thanks for commenting,

    Barbara

  3. JeremyNo Gravatar on 16.05.2008 at 15:42 (Reply)

    I just checked your Twitter Budgie site - very cute! I like the degrees from MIT and Princeton and Harvard too. I always knew parakeets were smart!


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